I knew I’d want to check in and reflect on this day, every year, and pay attention to how quickly time flew, how unpredictable change arrived, and how fleeting all of it was.
The first time I [thought I] dissociated, my senses were awake but everything in my periphery had turned into thick, glossy plastic. I saw the trees by the walkway as two-dimensional and believed that if I went over and pushed, the wall would topple over. I went on (another) period of personal turmoil — a
When I was younger, I liked pretending to be busy. Without anyone teaching me, I understood that being unavailable meant you were needed. Important. Maybe even useful. And I loved being useful. I wrote to-do lists as long as my arm, pretending they meant success. I hated being lugged into other people’s plans, pretending I
Don’t tell Doc, but I wasn’t on my augmenter meds for a couple of weeks. I misplaced my set and didn’t have the money to replace it, so. Cue withdrawal and episodes. Being unhealthy feels like being stuck in a trap. You know you gotta get outta there, but you have to get out to
I was diagnosed with depression three months ago. It was straightforward, quick and unsurprising, like waking up slowly. I’d known for six years; the difference was now it would be official, and now I would start taking medication. My first-ever triggers were heartbreak and culture shock. Sailing in from a different country towards plain, grey