The first time I [thought I] dissociated, my senses were awake but everything in my periphery had turned into thick, glossy plastic. I saw the trees by the walkway as two-dimensional and believed that if I went over and pushed, the wall would topple over. I went on (another) period of personal turmoil — a
Peacefully turning 25 was… surreal. It was nothing like I thought it would look or feel. The past couple of birthdays I delayed having a really grand party, declaring that I was “saving it” for my quarter life mark. I was very nervous about the milestone overwhelm, expecting the anxiety of asking, “What have I
I. On resolutions When I was younger, new year resolutions were singular. Just one to start off the year, like “Exercise,” “Read every day,” or “Spend more time with friends.” They were habits that faded out into January such that the rest of the year had no resolve. As I aged and learned how much
2017 was a great, but in a way embarrassing, year for me. Maybe that’s the mark of growth: when you look back and realize how much better you could have done things, if you were only as wise then as you are now. To be able to say that about a year alone is big
Day one: In which we softly linger. This year lasted forever. I remember starting fresh and hopeful with two simple wishes: to get this boy to love me, and to be happy whether or not he did. In that regard, 2017 should have been a perfect success. But the year had better ideas for me.